According to Reinhold Niebuhr, “God, give us grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things which should be changed, and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the others.” We don’t do that. We want to prove our friends wrong. We want to tell people how strong we are, how smart we are. Look, you are not living for your friends. You are living for yourself. For that simple reason, you should be honest with yourself. Do not do things because you want to prove people wrong. Why is that? Because if you fail to do it, if you fail to accomplish it, you are going to be frustrated with yourself. Instead of doing something just to prove people wrong, why not do your own thing? Why not focus your whole attention on doing the things that can really make you a better person.
If you want to make peace with yourself, if you want to make peace with your life, do not worry yourself about what you cannot change. Just accept what you can change. As Shantideva once said, “If you can solve your problem, then what is the need of worrying? If you cannot solve it, then what is the use of worrying?” Don’t worry about what you cannot change. Because when you worry about it, you make it worse, not better. Don’t worry, just change what you change.